LOVE By Swit La Pond

Guest writer for "The NZDream" blog

For as long as humanity can remember and has existed, love has been an ever-present and defining element of our existence. Though it metamorphosizes and takes on various forms and interpretations, through generations and peoples to date, I am almost certain the emotions were undeniable and quite similar to the ones we feel. Though most were biased in favor of one gender, the scales have since been tipped and the balance seems to hold better by the day.

Love is quite a unique, yet rare and beautiful thing. I can't help but think of times past, pitching them with our times, to help me better understand my interpretation of love. It’s a utopia strictly for two, only if no daggers come hidden. Well, this applies nowadays. Back then, you would leave home to go to the river with your girls, for some laundry–gossip time. Your eye would have probably been caught by a certain lad, and you would wish to meet him. Daydreaming about your family with him. Sharing, over cackled, with your friends. When out of the bushes pop out men and warriors to take you off. No warning, no packing, no goodbyes. To meet your new unknown husband!

Or you would be playing with your dollies when a convoy of adults, strangers, comes into your home. You see from your mother and aunt’s reactions that this must be important, but you hear nothing. The discussion, like all others, would be for men. Only to find out, confused and with no explanations, that you are now a wife and to depart with these strangers!

There were no scales at all back then, I would say!

Nowadays, we raise our fists against such practices, labeling them as abuse, kidnapping, abductions, and more. Our abuse was their definition of love. Flipped over! No need to worry about the hearts, the fortune your marriage bought, and the respect it bestowed, was purely love! It must have been some life they had. It pains me to think most of these women and girls never knew how it felt, to love and be loved genuinely. Free, without need for any other reason except love itself.

But then, it hits me, our generation is no different. We measure love based on bank balances, properties owned, cars per fleet, and the general outlook of the person. Though we exchange humans for money, with consent, we still choose to ignore the key elements of what fulfills true love. We cheat and are discontent and mask unattached relations for status. We are no different than times past, in my view. We are just technologically advanced, have better infrastructure, and have modified the skeletal outlook of love. But we have no clue about the emotions, how to fully unlock their potential, and how to give some out, myself included. I am still learning. Our interpretations of love are found wanting.

Wealth, infatuation, and lust drive our so-called love. Yet our hearts wail and are lonely inside. We have partners to show, but are single and still searching in our hearts. The ends justify the means.... The cars and the gifts balance out the hollowness and loneliness. The constant irritations and hidden disapproval, bordering on hatred and the absence of connection, all shrouded by titles and bling.

If only we all found what true love is, the serenity it brings and the growth it births. The merging of two dreams, to paint a magical future. Love makes your world stop. When you think of your person, it stifles your breath with excitement, and it just feels like an extension of you.

Have you ever looked someone in the eye and found the understanding you have been seeking for your whole life without them saying even a single word?

Have you ever sat and have your mind refuse to unclench its grip on a mere name? Have you ever wished dreams were real, then discover yours was breathing nearby all along?

That is love for me. The beauty of two hearts creating one mesmerizing world. With nothing else to guide, except the yearning to be together! The simplicity of it, the genuity and honesty, and the natural flow of blended souls define love for me!